


Cupid, Draw Back Your Bow

by hughie87



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-03
Updated: 2014-12-03
Packaged: 2018-02-27 23:27:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2710553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hughie87/pseuds/hughie87
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Felicity refuses to let Oliver continue making bad choices.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cupid, Draw Back Your Bow

**Author's Note:**

> I had to fix 3x07. Had to. You're welcome. =D

_Cupid, draw back your bow,_

_And let your arrows flow,_

_Straight to my lover's heart for me._

_\- Sam Cooke, 1961_

* * *

 

A waiter in a smart, white short jacket pushed away the dessert cart from their table as Felicity's phone vibrated for the **_thirtieth_** time since she and Ray had sat down. Smiling engagingly at the joke Gardner was telling, Felicity slid her phone out of her clutch. Surreptitiously dropping her napkin beside her ankle, she made the pretense of bending over to retrieve the square while she opened yet another message from Digg.

**_"_ ** **_TARGET MEETING GOING DOWN. TECHNICAL ASSISTANCE MIGHT BE NEEDED. PLEASE STAND BY."_ **

"I am **_so_** sorry. **_Again_** _,_ " Felicity implored as she sat back up suddenly, cutting off the punch line of Gardner's joke. "My landlord just called. Apparently, there is a gas leak in my apartment building. I need to…" Felicity slowed to a halt when she realized the major issue for gas leaks was to get people **_out_** of their homes, not a reason to go **_to_** a home. "Pick up my cat," she finished quickly as she stuffed her phone into her clutch.

Ray narrowed his eyes as Felicity stood quickly amidst the sympathetic gasps from Gardner and his wife. "When did you get a cat?" He questioned.

Felicity nodded quickly. "Impulse purchase. Those ASPCA stalls will get you every time! Lovely meeting you. I have to go." She mouthed **_'sorry'_** in the direction of a half-standing Ray as she sprinted away from the table as safely as she could in her heels.

She dashed through the restaurant, weaving through the tables and almost upsetting a waiter with a tray of cocktails. The door was just ahead; she pushed it open and stepped out into the balmy air of the Californian night. Standing on the sidewalk, Felicity realized in her haste to get to the Arrowcave under the club, she hadn't driven herself. She withdrew the phone from her clutch and activated an app that would have a cab at her location in two minutes.

"Felicity."

She turned toward the sound of her name, fighting the panic as she saw Ray coming through the doors.

"Look, I know you –"

"I had a cat as a child. His name was Pickles. Mean son a bitch. Anyway… I liked him. It's fine." He smiled easily.

"I was just going to send for a cab," Felicity explained, feeling that his presence there deserved an explanation.

"Ah, yes," Ray replied. "That is why I came out here. Take the car from the service."

"But won't you need it to get home yourself?" Felicity reminded him gently.

Ray shrugged as he pushed a few buttons on the watch he'd replaced after he'd given her mother the test model. "Just remember to send it back."

"Oh, right," Felicity laughed lightly.

They waited in comfortable silence until a sleek charcoal gray Lincoln pulled up to the curb. Ray stepped forward and opened the door, taking Felicity and handing her inside.

"And once you get…" Ray paused for a name as he still held the door open, Felicity ensconced inside.

"Mr. Diggles," she rushed out, unable to think of any other suitable name for a cat at a moment's notice.

"Once you get Mr. Diggles taken care of," Ray continued with a charming smile. "Your company would still be greatly appreciated. There is dessert and dessert coffee and after-dinner cocktails to come. I can still do some serious damage with a few napkins tied together and thrown over a rafter."

Felicity couldn't help but smile at another over-dramatized suicide plan. "I will try to make it back before the cocktails. Wouldn't want you to attempt any kind of Molotov substitute with the alcohol, would we?"

"You're giving me ideas," Ray responded, winking before he shut the door and stepped back up on the sidewalk.

"Back to your office, ma'am?" The driver asked.

Felicity couldn't afford the time delay of going to her office and then driving to the Cave. She dug around in her clutch and pulled out the fifty she carried around for emergencies. Slipping over the driver's shoulder and waving it under his nose, she said, "If you keep the location between me and you, I'd be very grateful."

The driver nodded and took the fifty, folding it and stuffing it in his pocket. He turned off the GPS system which also logged all routes the drivers took. "Where to, ma'am?"

"Verdant, it's a nightclub in The Glades."

The driver nodded. "I know the place."

"I'll throw in an extra twenty if you have me there in under ten minutes," Felicity added.

"Hang on to your diamonds, lady."

True to his word, the driver had her at Verdant in seven minutes. There were times Felicity held on to the diamonds decked around her throat for fear they would crash and she'd die but she swore she wouldn't die before she'd saved that ten million dollars.

"I'd rather be here, too, than that stuffy restaurant back there," the driver commented as Felicity planted the promised twenty in his outstretched palm after she got out of the car. He looked curiously around them at the bustling crowd waiting to gain entrance to the club.

"Yeah, well, for me the real work is only just beginning," Felicity said off-handedly.

The driver's face was confused until understanding dawned. His eyes widened and his brows lifted, mouth opening a touch.

"Oh, no!" Felicity exclaimed. "I'm not a hooker. I'm not here to pick up men. Or women, either! No, I don't work crowds like that. What I meant was –"

The driver held up his hand. "You have a nice night, ma'am. Thanks for the tip." He rolled up the window and began to move the car forward slowly.

"But, I'm really not!" Felicity called after him. She shook her head and headed in the direction of the back entrance. She didn't have time to worry about what one rent-a-driver thought of her lifestyle choices. There was a small rumble of thunder. Felicity stopped to look up at the gathering storm clouds as she made it to the door. The low hanging clouds explained the humidity making the air cloying.

Putting in her code, Felicity opened the door and took the stairs carefully in her heels. As soon as she reached the bottom, she kicked the heels off and looked around for any of her team. She heard a low whistle and turned to see Digg walking toward her.

"Now **_that_** is a dress," he commented with flattery.

Felicity did a small curtsy. She pointed to her neck. **_"Ten million dollars,"_** she enunciated slowly.

Digg's eyes bulged. "Whatever you do tonight, try not to lose you head."

"Ah, well," Felicity replied with a smile. "I kept my head through the ride over here. I'd say me and my best friends are doing just fine."

"I'm glad you came," Digg told her quietly.

"Not sure just what technical punches Oliver might need against Stupid Cupid, but it's better I be here just in case. What is going on exactly?"

Diggle gave her a brief run down and the two of them waited a bit tensely for Oliver to call when he reached the agreed meeting spot. And then Oliver's voice broke over the speaker from the monitor Felicity was working at.

**_"_ ** **_Digg, you there?"_ **

"And me! Me, being Felicity," Felicity added, though she didn't know who else Oliver would think it was. Laurel had been known to crash a Team Arrow party, though, occasionally. It was important that Oliver knew she came, that when the chips were down, she had his back no matter what.

"What's you twenty?" Diggle asked as he walked up beside Felicity's chair.

**_"_** ** _Subway stop, downtown,"_** Oliver answered.

"Why did Cutter have you meet her there?" Digg continued to question.

Oliver was silent before answering. **_"Because this is where I saved her."_**

Diggle and Felicity shared a weighted look. Then a new voice was heard over the comlinks.

**_"_ ** **_Hello, lover."_ **

Felicity's stomach clenched. The sugary-sweet voice calling Oliver 'lover' caused her skin to prickle angrily. She knew Oliver didn't return any of the feelings this misguided woman was peddling, but it didn't make hearing her overt sexual tones easier.

A small smile flittered across Felicity's face when she heard Oliver growl in return, **_"I'm not your lover."_**

**_"_ ** **_Well, maybe not yet but after one night with me that will all change. I promise."_ **

Felicity's smile disappeared. She glanced over at Diggle and was relieved to see he wasn't watching the play of emotions across her face. As Oliver spoke, the two leaned in closer. They listened as Oliver and Carrie traded words. Diggle gave in to tense pacing and crossed to the other side of Felicity, keeping his eyes on the speaker as if they could see the two archers standing in the alleyway.

**_"_** ** _She thinks love is the disease, but it's not. Love is the cure,"_** Carrie groused.

Felicity pressed her lips together; something in the woman's words causing tears to gather at the corner of her eyes. She swallowed nervously.

**_"_** ** _I understand that you're hurting,"_** Oliver replied. **_"And I know what it's like to want someone… But not be able to be with them. How you wish things could be different, but they can't._** **"**

Chills broke out over Felicity's skin as she listened to Oliver try to talk Carrie down; talking about them. Her heart beat harder as she waited for what he would say next. The tears were becoming more difficult to hold back. The pain she had been holding at bay for the past few weeks was threatening to overtake her and leave her a quivering mass in front of the keyboard.

**_"_ ** **_I can't be with you. I can't be with anyone. I have to be alone."_ **

Felicity looked off to the right, away from where Diggle was standing. She could feel his eyes on her. She blinked quickly; refusing to cry here, to show weakness in this place.

**_"_** ** _No, you don't,"_** Carrie replied angrily. **_"You're a liar."_**

Even though she was certifiably crazy with a capital 'C', Felicity agreed with her. Oliver didn't have to be alone; he **_chose_** to be alone.

All of Felicity's raging thoughts came to a halt when she heard the swish of a flying arrow.

**_"_** ** _I don't want to hurt you,"_** Oliver told Carrie genuinely.

**_"_ ** **_You already have."_ **

Felicity's mind warred between her aching heart and keeping track of the fight that was ensuing between Oliver and Carrie. There was the sound of metal breaking and then suddenly, Oliver's green circle disappeared from the map. Felicity and Diggle leaned over the work-top frantically as **'TRACKING SIGNAL LOST'** blinked frustratingly on the screen in front of them.

"Oliver?" Digg called. "Get 'em back. Oliver!"

Felicity began working quickly, running programs and traces, attempting to reconnect with the signal hidden inside Oliver's comlink. She was sluggish and she knew it, but she'd been taken by surprise by the honestly of Oliver's words and voice. Since the run-in with Cooper, Felicity had felt a balance return to her relationship with Oliver. She'd felt they were slowly slipping back to what they once were: partners, friends. Tonight, however, had blown off the rug of denial she's swept her pain under. It was easier to fake like she was moving on when she thought Oliver was doing the same thing. How could she try to put her heart and life back together if the man who'd dismantled them in first place still yearned for her like she did for him?

Something beeped and Felicity looked at the screen, seeing the green dot active again.

"Oliver?" Felicity asked tightly. She and Diggle waited while static ebbed and flowed; their nerves shortening with each passing second. Felicity fidgeted, fear causing her throat close in and making it hard to breathe. **_"Oliver?!"_**

**_"_** ** _I'm here, Felicity,"_** he finally spoke, his voice breathy from exertion. **_"I'm here. I'm okay."_**

"What happened?" Diggle questioned. "Where is Cutter?"

**_"_** ** _We fell through some metal grating into the subway tunnel,"_** Oliver explained ** _. "The fall must have disconnected the comlink. Carrie is restrained. Can you get A.R.G.U.S. over here? I think they may have a new member for the Suicide Squad."_**

"On it," Diggle said quickly, flipping out his phone and pressing it to his ear as he took a few steps away to make the call.

Sitting forlornly in her chair, Felicity watched as Diggle called in a request from a team to be dispatched to Oliver's location. Returning to the work station, Diggle asked, "Anything else you need, man?"

**_"_ ** **_No. You two go ahead and take off. I'll wait here for the team before heading back."_ **

The link went dead. Diggle busied himself with something that Felicity couldn't see. She pushed herself from the chair. She was shaken and she needed to get out of here.

"John, could you take me back to my office?" She requested in a small voice.

Digg faced her with a concerned expression at the use of his first name.

"Are you okay?" He crossed the short space them, reaching out and touching her arm.

Felicity nodded with a tremulous smile. They both knew it did nothing to convince him.

"Yeah, come on," Digg began. "I need to head on over to A.R.G.U.S. and make sure Cutter's transfer goes smoothly. I'll drop you off on the way."

"Thanks," Felicity sniffed. She was trying hard to fight back tears.

The trip to the newly named Palmer Technologies Building was silent. Felicity sat staring out the window as the city passed by. She knew Diggle wanted to talk to her but politely restrained himself. She couldn't take any loaded questions right now. She knew Oliver felt he needed to be alone but each time she heard the words, it made a new crack in her heart. She couldn't go on like this. She had to move on and more than just acting like she was. She needed to move on once and for all. She couldn't sit around playing at life waiting for the day Oliver decided 'maybe' was not enough any longer.

Diggle pulled up to the curb in front of the tall building and placed the car in 'park'. He faced Felicity in his seat.

"Thanks again, Digg," Felicity said softly. She grasped the handle to open the door when Digg's hand on her shoulder stopped her. "John, please."

"You know Oliver doesn't want to be alone," Diggle spoke gently. "You know he only did that because he's afraid. He's afraid you will get too close and he'll lose you. It was never about not being able to be the Arrow and Oliver Queen at the same time. It was never about Sara's death. It has always been about Oliver being afraid to let himself feel that much."

"Oliver has made his choice," Felicity repeated. Gone was the bravado and self-assurance she'd possessed earlier in her office. Now her voice was snuffled; the way it sounded when she was on the verge of crying.

"Felicity, Oliver didn't make a choice. He ducked and ran. That's not a choice. That's a diversion tactic."

Shaking her head, Felicity opened the door and got out of the car. Leaning her head inside, she looked at Diggle with bright eyes shiny with unshed tears. _"_ _ **Good night,**_ John. Thank you for the ride." She shut the door smartly and sauntered into the building. She knew Digg thought both she and Oliver were being stubborn, but the fact was she had told Oliver she wouldn't wait for him. And Oliver hadn't come after her. There was nothing anyone could say except Oliver to change her mind. They still wanted each other but Oliver would not allow them to be together.

The building was almost completely deserted. She met only a handful of employees still burning the midnight oil and a few custodians. The trek up to her office was quiet one with her thoughts safely focused on something other than Oliver. Felicity was tired and her body ached for the time spent in her heels all day long. She wanted to go home, draw a bath and sink into her tub in a castle of jasmine scented bubbles. Home was quiet, though. Too quiet and there was nothing to focus her busy mind on. As exhausted as she was, work would have to be her solace at this moment.

She stepped onto the floor her office was located on. Felicity stopped, gazing at the large open space she now occupied. It was her office but she remembered the times she'd shared there with Oliver; when this was Oliver's office and she was his less-than-content executive secretary and his oh-so-happy partner in vigilantism. Accessing the lights in the panel just outside the entrance to the antechamber, she flooded the suite of glassed-in rooms with cool blue tinted beams. She set her clutch on the smooth desk top and sat down, turning on her computer and signing in to her secured work database. Pulling up her project files, she opened a few windows and lost herself in numbers and algorithms and filtering patterns.

"Ah…" a voice disturbed her numeric induced peaceful state about an hour later. Felicity looked up to see Ray walking jauntily into her office. She had completely forgotten about Ray. And the dinner! Ray had counted on her and she'd let him down. "I thought I might find you here."

Felicity looked back at the computer and quickly finished up a waiting command action. "I thought I'd get a jump on that server encryption you asked for. Trying to, you know, make up for ruining the deal tonight," she added sheepishly.

"You're definition of ruin is **_vastly_** different from mine," Ray smirked. "Gardner's gonna sell."

Felicity couldn't muster the excitement she knew was expected of her, but she did the best she could. "That's amazing."

"It's all thanks to you," Ray remarked gratefully.

Ray's expression and voice filled the empty space Felicity had felt since she's left the cave. It made her feel appreciated and valued and uneasy all at the same time.

"But," She smiled coyly as she stood from her chair and rounded her desk, breaking the endearment of the moment. "Really, I should be thanking you. I mean, not just for the new job but for this amazing and expensive necklace." She ran her fingers lightly against the plain yet breath-taking stones at her neck.

A chuckle escaped from Ray at Felicity's noticeable shift in direction. He looked down at his shoes and then back at her.

"You have to take them back, don't you?" She asked reluctantly.

"Yeah, kinda do," Ray replied with a quirked brow and a full smile and laugh. "Here, let me help you."

Ray came over to Felicity, reaching around under her lifted hair to unclasp the string of diamonds.

"Thank you," Felicity said quietly.

"You know, Felicity Smoak," Ray began, a fond smile gracing his face. "You're different from anyone I've ever met. You deserve all those things. And more."

He held the diamonds between them, gazing down at her. Felicity knew what was about to happen; could read it in his face. Ray leaned down, capturing Felicity's lips in a searching kiss. Closing her eyes, Felicity gave herself to it, resting her hands on the sides of his body. She waited for his arms to wrap around and to pull her close, pull her into his warmth. All she wanted was to chase away his loneliness; to take away all the pain and the sadness he'd lived with for so long. She wanted to show him life was better with someone to share the burdens with and to not walk through it alone; that being alone was more dangerous than anything that could ever happen to them if they were together.

His hands grazed her arms, their smoothness gliding along her warm skin. Something began screaming in Felicity's mind. None of this was right! The man kissing her shouldn't have smooth palms but calloused ones from battles for survival. And he shouldn't smell like an expensive forest but worn leather from the streets. Felicity pulled back with a small cry of distaste.

"I'm sorry," Felicity mumbled, pressing the back of her hand to her mouth. "I can't do this. This is wrong. It's all wrong."

Ray shook his head, backing away from her. "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have – that was inappropriate. I hope you don't think that –"

Felicity stared at her shoes, not listening to a word Ray was babbling. Her head snapped up, a bright smile blooming on her face. "I have to go."

"Yeah, uh, sure, yeah," Ray rambled.

Felicity grabbed her clutch and stepped around Ray. "I'll see you tomorrow. I'll get the dress back to you, then, but I have to go now!" She threw over her shoulder, leaving Ray standing uncomfortably in the middle of her vacant office. She walked briskly to the elevator, calling it up and stepping into it, hitting the button for the bottom level of the car garage.

Diggle was right. Oliver ran at the first sign of trouble and Felicity had let him, concluding that she didn't want a relationship with a man who was always going to be one step away from calling it off for fear of the repercussions. Listening to him talk to Carrie tonight over the links, she knew he was as lonely as she had been this past month. He didn't sound like a man who wanted to be alone but one who was resigned to his fate.

Oliver made his choice, but it was the wrong one. And Felicity was going to do what she did best. She was going to ignore all the wrong choices Oliver made and show him the right ones instead.

* * *

Oliver waited a few feet away from the wooden beam he'd attached Carrie to with her own handcuffs until a team from A.R.G.U.S. came to collect her. As she was led away, she kissed the air in his direction. Amanda was going to have to watch that one. Returning to his motorcycle he had stashed around the corner from where Carrie wanted to meet, Oliver ignited the engine and headed back to the Cave. He knew Diggle had taken Felicity back to work thanks to a text Digg sent him. Oliver was both relieved and sad to hear that. He knew after this emotionally charged encounter, the last thing he needed was to be in the same room as Felicity in the vulnerable state he was. However, he liked seeing Felicity after these moments. She was the bit of sunlight that filtered in through the broken boards he kept around himself. Even if he felt he couldn't be with her the way they both wanted, he still needed to see her; a need so strong it was like oxygen to him. She was slipping away from him. He never expected her to wait for the unknown day to come when he felt he could allow more into his life but the reality of her moving away from him and the pain it caused was unexpected.

Once in the sublevel of Verdant, Oliver put his Arrow paraphernalia away in the glass cabinets and changed into some street clothes. He looked at the hand that he had dislocated his thumb on to escape the handcuffs Carrie had thrown on his wrist in their struggle. It was beginning to swell. Sneaking upstairs, using the boisterous crowd as cover, he slipped behind the bar and grabbed a metal bowl. Filling it with ice from the freezer, he returned to the Cave below to ice his hand. He flinched slightly as he settled his sore and swelling hand atop the cold ice.

Time passed as Oliver sat there with his hand gingerly on the ice. He heard someone enter the Cave from behind him. Lifting his hand, he looked at it closely; some of the swelling had lessened.

"Well, it's done," Diggle stated in greeting as he entered the Cave. Oliver looked over his shoulder and followed Digg with his eyes as he came to stand before him. "Lyla said Cutter is even nuttier than the last woman they had on the Suicide Squad. You sure this was a good idea; handing her over to Waller?" Digg questioned once more, showing his own doubts.

"Iron Heights isn't right for her," Oliver explained, leaning back in the chair. "At least on the Squad, she can make a difference."

Diggle was silent for a moment as if he was weighing his next sentence. "Lyla is preparing a late dinner, if you want to join."

Oliver smiled sadly, a little surprised a dinner invitation was what Diggle had been thinking about during his moment of retrospect. "No, I'm good. Thank you."

"Listen, Oliver," Diggle finally started after taking a deep breath. Oliver lifted his eyes. He knew Digg had been waiting to say something other than a sampling of Lyla's cooking. "Felicity heard what you said to Cutter: about being alone."

Schooling his features, Oliver looked up at Digg once more. He knew Felicity probably heard him but he'd been carefully avoiding that line of thought this evening. He was sure his words hurt her because they hurt him as he said them.

Diggle continued. "If her reaction was any indication, she does _not_ want to be. You gotta tell her how you feel before it's too late."

Oliver sighed.

"Just food for thought," Diggle finished. He walked away, patting Oliver on the shoulder as he went.

Oliver stared out in front of him. Felicity knew how he felt for her. Telling her again would only cause her more pain since Oliver refused to be with her. It was already too late, wasn't it?

Pushing out of the chair, Oliver began to pace. Before it's too late… What did Diggle mean? If anyone knew how Oliver felt, it was John. All he wanted was for Felicity to be happy. And if that meant moving on without him, then so be it.

**_"_ ** **_If you wanted her to be happy, you'd be with her, man."_ **

Digg's earlier words haunted him. Felicity's happiness was even more important than his own. Oliver loved Felicity with a passion that outweighed anything he'd felt before. Felicity made him feel like a person, a man. She reminded him that he could do better things, greater things than even he thought he was capable of. She believed in him. She made him laugh; she made him _feel_. She made him happy. And after seven years, he never thought he could be happy again.

The thought that by keeping himself from her, he was causing her to be unhappy, was too much for him to bear. Especially when he was unhappy himself. Oliver stopped and scrubbed his hands over his face. He thought this was the better way. He didn't fear dying. He knew that one day it would happen and he had made peace with that every time he put on his leathers. What he feared was leaving Felicity behind if he did. He didn't want her to be alone.

Oliver stopped. He didn't want her to be alone. He could be alone; he'd done it and in some ways it was better. He wanted Felicity to be happy and she wasn't happy alone. And she was alone because of him. He tightened his jaw

And if Oliver didn't act fast, it would be too late because Felicity was rapidly pushing the door closed on what the two of them shared. Oliver could say all of this was for her, for Felicity, but he knew he needed her just as much as she needed to be with him. He could be alone but he didn't want to be.

Setting his shoulders, Oliver strode with purpose toward the stairs leading out of the Cave, grabbing his helmet as he went. He flew through the city on his bike, weaving in and out of traffic. In his haste to reach Felicity, he took more daring moves than he should have but all he could think of was getting to Palmer Technologies, sprinting to her office, pulling her into his arms and never letting her go.

With a screech, he pulled his bike up to the curb and jumped up, jogging through the open doors. Nodding at a few of the custodial staff that still recognized him, he made it to the elevator and traveled to the top floor. His heart was pounding faster with every heave upward. When the doors opened, he stepped out. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Oliver walked excitedly toward Felicity's open office door. Arriving at the door, he stopped and looked around for Felicity. His stomach lurched when he saw her pressed to Ray in a heated kiss.

He gripped the metal of the doorframe to keep himself from falling to the floor. Pain bloomed heavy inside him, even sharper than the pain he felt at the thought of her moving on. Because it was no longer theoretical; it was happening and it hurt like hell. He didn't want to see anymore. He cast his eyes down and turned, walking dejectedly back to the elevator. He felt as if the building was closing in on him. Making it back outside, he took a deep breath of the cool night air. Clenching his jaw, he got back on his bike.

He rode around Starling City for a long time, not knowing where to go. He just wandered. He didn't want to go back to the Cave just yet. At least out in the city, he could lose himself in the lights and the sounds around him. At the Cave, there was only silence. Silence and him sitting their listening to the sounds of his broken heart. When his tank was almost empty, he returned to the Cave.

With heavy steps, he walked down into his headquarters and make-shift housing. The silence was oppressive. He looked around. He saw Felicity everywhere here. Oliver no longer thought of this as his place, but hers. Her computers; her chair; her turquoise sweater she kept over on a hook for when she got cold; her chipped coffee mug sitting by the bright green fern at her desk. He put his hands on the smooth metal table, leaning over and breathing through his nose. He looked over again, looking at the bright green fern sitting cheerfully across from him.

**_"_ ** **_A fern. It thrives in low light."_ **

The fern had been his hope for the past month. If a fern could flourish down here, so could he. He had thrived in the light of Felicity's unspoken love and now she was gone. The image of Ray and Felicity flashed across his mind and white hot anger boiled to the surface. Gritting his teeth, he balled his fists and slammed them on the tabletop brutally. It wasn't enough. His arm shot out, pulling back and sweeping the contents off violently as he gave into the fury whirling around in his body; sending the bottles and other containers all clattering and rolling onto the floor. He took a few menacing steps toward the fern, wishing to rip the fluffy leaves to shreds. He needed to damage something the same way Felicity had damaged him.

"Whoa…" Oliver swung around, eyes wide as he watched Felicity sidle into the Cave. "What did those specimen cups do to you?"

He was taken aback at her presence. "What are you doing here?" The rage was still within him, making his voice and expression stormy. She was the last person he wanted or needed to see at this moment.

"Nice to see you, too," Felicity muttered as she walked past Oliver and set her bag on the desk next to the fern. She fingered the leaves tenderly and then reached in and felt the soil. Oliver took in the change in her appearance. She'd taken her hair down and it fell against her back in soft waves. Her glasses were back in place and she'd changed from the fancy blue dress she'd been wearing earlier to a knee-length print dress covered in colorful swirls topped with a green cardigan. Before he could stop himself, Oliver's eyes traveled along her legs to the ankle boots she wore before coming back up. He swallowed convulsively when he met her amused blue-gray eyes behind the frames.

He shook his head a little. "What are you doing here, Felicity?" He asked again. To avoid looking at her, he began picking up the things he'd pushed off the table during his outpouring of emotions.

"I, um, I wanted to check on you," Felicity replied. She picked up the water bottle Oliver used to spritz the fern with so it didn't try out. She gave a few sprays as Oliver set the specimen cups back on the table. The fine water mist landed on the fern while some of it arced into the room, becoming translucent as it fell. "I had to leave and go back to the office but I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm…" Oliver had his back to her. He closed his eyes, centering himself. "I'm fine," he answered as he faced her, leaning his hips on the table behind him.

Felicity mirrored his position. "Are you? Because judging by the way that table was on the receiving end of some massive anger issues, I would say there is something going on. Wanna talk about it?"

The irony of her question was not lost on Oliver. A sarcastic grin overtook Oliver's usually affable face. "I don't think there is really much to say, Felicity."

Felicity took a deep breath in through her nose. She crossed her arms and met Oliver's gaze with steely determination.

"You sure had some things to say to Carrie tonight," she began in monotone. "We all know you don't talk about your feelings to us but you have no problem baring your soul to someone who belongs in a mental institution."

"What do you want me to say, Felicity?" Oliver stammered, the tight rein he thought he'd had on his emotions slipping. "We've already said everything-" He broke off, not able to finish his sentence.

Felicity shook her head. "Not everything."

Oliver clenched his fists. She was about to tell him about her and Ray.

"You think you have to be alone, but you don't want to be," Felicity almost whispered. She took a few steps toward Oliver.

Confusion furrowed Oliver's brows. He watched Felicity closely.

"I stood right here and I told you that I would not wait down here with you," Felicity spoke softly, almost tenderly. For the first time, Oliver noticed tears in Felicity's eyes. She trembled as she stood before him. Oliver waited with tried patience for her to continue. She looked down at her shoes and before snapping her head up to look him straight in the eye. "I thought I loved you too much to watch you wait down here to die. I was wrong."

Oliver's chest constricted at her words. Felicity had never told him she loved him. He knew she felt something for him, but the words falling from her lips made him ache. He fought to keep his posture loose. He longed to jump up and press her to him but he held back because she wasn't done. And he didn't know how this was going to end.

Felicity pressed her lips together. She gazed at Oliver's face and her eyes softened. "I love you too much to **_let you."_**

Standing to his feet, Oliver took a few steps toward her only to stop when she held up her hand.

"Don't tell me you're sorry. Don't tell me you love me," Felicity continued, tears tracking down her supple cheeks. "Tell me you don't want to be alone anymore. Tell me –"

Whatever Felicity's next words were, they were lost in the crash of Oliver's lips upon hers. The kiss was surprising and Felicity startled only to realize what was happening. Tilting her head to the right, she leaned against Oliver as she savored the feel of his mouth on hers again. Oliver kissed her tenderly, cupping the back of her head, burying his fingers in her luxurious hair, his other arm wrapped around her tightly to ensure she didn't slip away.

"I don't want to be alone," Oliver gasped as he pulled away for both of them to breathe. He looked down into her moist eyes, his hands coming up to cup her face gently. He moved a hand to wipe away a tear with his thumb, continuing to caress her cheek.

Felicity smiled brightly, blinking away tears from behind foggy glass lenses. She let out a breathy chuckle as she rested her hands against his chest, nuzzling her face into his hands.

"You're not going to talk yourself out of this again, are you?" Felicity inquired in a voice that brooked any argument. "Because I am prepared to put up a hell of a fight this time."

Oliver shook his head. "No, not this time. I was wrong the first time."

"About thinking you could be the Arrow and Oliver Queen at the same time or about your life only ending one way?" Felicity's voice was soft and she moved her left up to lay where his heart beat solidly against her palm.

"Both," Oliver answered, covering Felicity's hand with his own. He looked down into her eyes. "My life may end that way and I am prepared for that." Oliver paused. Felicity nodded. She had, too, and that was the reason she wanted what she could have with him while she could. Those feelings seemed to be communicated across the waves of emotions around them because Oliver slowly smiled as if he understood what she was thinking. "So I want to live as much as I can," he finished.

With a glad yelp, Felicity stood up on her tiptoes, taking Oliver's face in her hands as she kissed him soundly. He kissed her back passionately. They parted reluctantly once more, Oliver leaning his forehead against hers.

"I thought I was too late," Oliver murmured, lowering his hands to clutch Felicity's hips, pressing her body closer to his, to feel her heart beating next to his. "I thought I had lost you."

Felicity shook her head. "You almost did," she replied in a whisper.

It wasn't clear is she wanted a response, but Oliver lifted his head and looked down at her, pain filling his eyes. "I saw you and Ray."

Her eyes mirrored his and he was sorry he brought it up, but he needed to know. She ducked her head, gathering her thoughts before meeting his eyes again.

"I'm sorry you saw that," she said simply.

Oliver smirked. "You're not sorry you did it?"

**"** ** _He_** kissed **_me_** _,_ for the record," Felicity began smugly. "And no, I'm not sorry I kissed him back because it's what got me here." She leaned her chin against Oliver's chest, looking up with him with her large, beautiful eyes that right now danced teasingly. "He doesn't kiss as well as you do."

"I'm glad to hear that," Oliver replied.

"It was just wrong, Oliver," Felicity continued. "I could tell it was wrong. There is only one man who is supposed to kiss me and he is standing right in this room."

Oliver looked around and then back to Felicity. "I'm assuming you mean me."

The two smiled almost giddily at each other. This happiness was new and they didn't know how long it would last, but they would take advantage of it while they could.

"Where do we go from here?" Felicity questioned a few moments later as they still stood in the middle of the Cave in each other's arms. Neither one wanted to break the spell they had cast around them.

"Back to the beginning?"

"Oh, not that far. I'm no longer just an IT girl."

"You were never **_just_** an IT girl," Oliver told her huskily. "Let's start with dinner."

"How about we start with what would have happened **_after_** dinner," Felicity suggested, running her hands up to Oliver's shoulders as he chuckled softly. "Oh, unless we're not there yet. We might not be there yet, and if not we can go to dinner again…" Felicity amended quickly, reading his chuckle as her jumping the gun.

Oliver swooped down and kissed Felicity hungrily. When he pulled away, Felicity blushed but licked her lips.

"Oh, yeah," she mumbled.

"Come on," Oliver smiled widely, taking her hand. He looked down at their clasped hands and a feeling on contentment he'd never felt filled him. Leisurely, the two climbed the stairs and out of the Cave, into a fresh, rain-washed night.

* * *

A knock interrupted Diggle and Lyla just as they were sitting down. Lyla looked at John with a lifted eyebrow.

"I did invite Oliver," John reminded himself as well as telling Lyla. "I hope you don't mind the company."

Lyla shook her head and said teasingly, "Do I really have a choice?"

John leaned over and kissed her quickly before heading to the door. He opened the door, revealing Oliver.

"Hi," Oliver started, his expression happy and his eyes merry. Diggle hadn't seen him looking so carefree since a few months ago. Something had changed. "I know it's late, but uh –"

"That was the invitation," Digg finished for him.

"I hope you don't mind, but I brought some people with me," Oliver said, gesturing behind him to Roy who'd he and Felicity had met just outside the club.

"Nah, man. Get in here," John replied. He opened the door wider and Roy stepped around Oliver into the apartment.

"Hmm, something smells good," Roy observed as he entered, hugging Lyla as she stood to greet them.

Digg turned back to Oliver just as the man was reaching over to his side, pulling a bashful looking Felicity with him into the apartment with him. Digg looked from Felicity to Oliver, taking in their flushed cheeks and bright eyes and their linked hands between them.

"Finally!" Digg breathed in exasperation. The big man barreled for Oliver, catching him off guard in a bear hug. Oliver laughed and hugged him back awkwardly, patting him on the back. Releasing Oliver, Diggle grabbed Felicity, hugging her gently. Felicity stood up on her tiptoes, whispering a 'thank you' into John's ear and placing a kiss on his cheek. Roy and Lyla hung back a little, letting the trio have their moment.

Standing back, Diggle smiled at his closest friends, placing a hand on each other shoulders. Then he proclaimed, "Let's eat!"


End file.
